Eternal Families—Temple Sealings: The Discussion Continues

In response to my last post on Eternal Families—Temple Sealings,
Anonymous said...

I guess that leaves me wondering.... In the end isn't EVERYBODY sealed to EVERYBODY? We are all "brothers and sisters" and if we go back far enough we are all related because we are ALL sons and daughters of one Heavenly Father and Mother right?

Most children marry and have their own family in their life. Why is is necessary to be sealed to parents and children throughout every genteration when it all boils down to who your spouse is? That is the one true person that you are with. Parents have each other and chilren leave you to choose their own spouse.

So to me, that is a lot to keep track of when eventually the "temple work" of all is done once deceased, and the rules change anyway based on the circumstances of the situation.
I know that I am a daughter of a Heavenly Father who loves me. I am a good person, obey the commandments, and care for my fellow man. But in the end, do I believe that my loving Father in Heaven will keep me from my family because we are not technically "sealed"?! No. I don't.

Dear Annonymous-

Thank you so much for sharing your insights.  I too have had these very same thoughts as I have contemplated sealings and their purpose.  And, discussions such as these are the very reason I have this blog. 

You are absolutely correct.  The ultimate goal is for us all to be sealed to one another as one big eternal family, as we are "ALL sons and daughters of one Heavenly Father and Mother."  And, like you said, your spouse is the person for whom you have the most responsibility and with whom you become "one". 

"Why [then] is it necessary to be sealed to parents and children throughout every generation when it all boils down to who your spouse is?"  In my mind, this question stems from viewing sealings as simply a binding or union between individuals.  But, sealings are so much more than that.  They involve responsibility for and covenants made between individuals and with the Lord (as well as promised blessings from the Lord).  Therefore, there is, indeed, great meaning and purpose to sealings between spouses as well as between parents and children.  The covenants one makes when sealed bring eternal blessings and also are a form of true Christlike Charity (i.e., love of Christ) that allow us to truly live as an eternal family.

So, why are we sealed on earth, when we can be sealed after death by living proxies who attend the temple?  This is an excellent question.  Again, if a sealing was simply a "bond", I guess it wouldn't make any difference.  But, since a sealing involves eternal, committed covenants and numerous blessings, why would we not want to be sealed now and enjoy those blessings during this, our mortal life?  Also, I feel that making sealing covenants and commitments at the time of marriage (or as soon as we are worthy to do so), strengthens marital and parental relationships.  It's like everything of value in this life:  the more we put into it, the more we value it (and vice versa).  When I am sealed to my husband and children, I am committing myself to them and their well-being for eternity, not just for this mortal life.  Because sealings require eternal covenants from those involved, even those performed by proxy for those who are deceased are not binding without those individuals accepting and committing to those covenants themselves (the same is true for all ordinances performed in the temple by proxy for the dead—those for whom the ordinances are performed can choose whether or not to accept them—they still have their agency).

As for the "rules [changing] anyway based on the circumstances of the situation" (I assume you are referring to whether or not a sealing cancelation is granted.  Please correct me if I am misunderstanding):

I, personally, wouldn't phrase it as that the "rules change" for each circumstance.  It seems to me more accurate to say that the outcome varies depending on the circumstances.  Ultimately, the outcome is based entirely on the agency of those involved, not just with regard to whether or not two people are sealed or have their sealing canceled, but with regard to the blessings they are entitled too.  For example, if a couple is sealed, and then one spouse abuses and abandons the other, then, even if the couple never requested that their sealing being canceled, the abuser/abandoner would no longer be entitled to the blessings associated to that sealing (without fully repenting) as that individual has voided such blessings by shirking their responsibility.  However, the innocent spouse (and children) would still be entitled to all their blessings if they continue to hold true to their covenants.  Does that make sense?

Finally, as you said, you ARE "a daughter of a Heavenly Father who loves [you]."  That knowledge alone brings so many blessings in this life, where it is so easy to feel lost or alone.  Our Father in Heaven loves us ALL, even those who may not even consider themselves good, those who have made the worst of mistakes, etc.  His love is unconditional and eternal.  He is pleased when we make correct choices and follow His commandments; but, that is not because of pride or an authority complex.  He is pleased because He loves us as dearly and deeply as any parent could love and wants us to be happy.  This is why He has provided commandments for us--He knows that abiding by the commandments will give us that never-ending, enduring happiness that He so desperately wants for us.

Our Father in Heaven is ready and willing to give us all that He has.  And, He has prepared the way to make it possible for us to obtain that and achieve incomprehensible joy if we choose too.  So, you are right, in the end, would a loving Father in Heaven prevent us from being with our eternal family based on a technicality?  NO!  In fact, I strongly believe even if there are those who die without being sealed, and of whom records are never found to perform those ordinances by proxy, that the Lord has a way for them to receive those saving ordinances.  The Lord would never keep you from your family.  His ultimate goal is to bring us back home to Him.  Only WE have the power to keep us from our families.  We, like our Father in Heaven, must abide by natural, eternal laws.  If we refuse to commit to/care for/love our family, we will be unable to be with them (in essence, we would be exercising our agency and choosing not to be with them).  Like I mentioned above, even those who have passed on and for whom ordinances are performed by proxy have to accept those ordinances for them to be in effect.  It all comes down to the choice of the individual.

I hope that I have addressed all your questions fully and that this has been helpful in some way.  Please let me know if you have any more questions.  Thank you again for participating in the discussion.